Another face of facebook..!!

Facebook opened doors for new forms of friendship.  There is no denying of it. A school friend you have lost touch with, suddenly is there, just a click away. But, Facebook also allowed space for anonymity. Maureen Nawer writes about these anonymous, fake faces of facebook.

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When I got to know about Facebook back in 2008, I was curious like all other people to know what it is. Back in the days, hi5 was the cool shit we were in. Then suddenly people were switching to Facebook because apparently it was more interesting. Okay, let see what it is.

So, I opened a Facebook account from a friend’s computer and started with it. After a while I got to understand that here you get the most random friend requests possible. Not only that, you understand how narcissistic people can get. Are you thinking of selfies? Oh no, selfies are something we all take more or less, narcissistic or not. These days, hangouts aren’t even complete without Group selfies. Apparently, mobile phone companies are focusing on better front cameras than back cameras. But that is not the point. Facebook opens up to you a whole new category of morons who think they are Angels, Rockstars, Chocolate boys, Princesses and so on. Yeah, this time you got that right. I am talking about people with Facebook names such as Angel Anika, Rockstar Fahad, Chocolate boy Rafi and such.

The first time I got such a friend request, I laughed my head off. Well, I thought it was funny. I wanted to share it with friends, so I took a screenshot with Microsoft Paint (because we did not even own mobile phones, forget screenshots) and showed them. They did not find it funny because I was late in finding these out. They are already done laughing at this stuff. Anyway, I decided to visit some of these profiles to see what made them think they could name themselves as such and/or what made them turn away from the beautiful names that their parents have baptized them with. I got to know a few of them, and found a few factors.

First, these names make them think that they are presenting themselves to other people as the ‘kool kids’. Wait no, let me correct that – ‘k3wL KidZz’. Their sole agenda is to attract girls/guys to initiate ‘friendship’. Oh of course you understand why I put that in quotation marks. And if you haven’t, well, you are dumb, I cannot help that. I had a chocolate boy Fahad in my account back in my A level days. I had initially added him because he was a classmate. Then deleted him because he wanted to become too much of a ‘friend’. Thank you, it was nice meeting you, bye bye, unfriend.

Second, the ones those want to hide from their family members. Yes, you read that correct. Normally, these are the ones who pretend to be the saints in the family and put up a ‘good boy/girl’ impression in front of everyone. The other parents always bring these people up as ‘examples’ when scolding their daughters and sons. But what they don’t know is that they have girlfriends/boyfriends, which is a sin in our society. Now you’re thinking of me as a closed minded person. Oh please don’t! I am not saying having a partner is a bad thing. But you know how Asian parents are. Your whole life they will teach you not to talk to strangers, not to eat anything from strangers but then one fine day, they’ll marry you off to a rich, educated donkey and say NOW SLEEP WITH HIM. I’m sorry if that hurt but that’s the truth. The other ones would be the one who are not ‘allowed’ by their family to use Facebook. Their parents have heard from other places that Facebook is a bad thing and it will ruin your child’s future, waste their time blah blah blah, so, they warn their kid to never use Facebook. Poor parents trust their kids and the rest is history.

The third category of people is pure attention whores. They feed on likes, comments and the talks that spread about them. The poor souls lack talent but get jealous of the celebrities and want to make a name for themselves. What is the easiest way? Use Facebook!
Step 1 – Change your name to something catchy.
Step 2 – Do something stupid, record it and upload it on Facebook (mind it- stupid, not productive).
Step 3 – Act like you don’t give a damn about what people think.
Step 4 – Continue doing so.
Conclusion: People see you as a piece of flesh where the Almighty forgot to put brains, but oh well, you got what you wanted. YOU ARE FAMOUS!!

Hey! Did I just describe Ali Gster? I think I did. But oh well, look around you, you will find loads of Ali Gsters. If you have listened to just one ‘rap’ you know you will never be able to say or hear the phrase ‘it’s my city’ again or hear something about Faridpur and not mention him. If you do not know who this person is, please look him up on Facebook. Because if you still haven’t seen any of his videos, you yet do not know the limit to stupidity yet. Feel free to get yourself educated on that.

The fourth would be the ones who try to be unique. I am yet to find out a reason behind that. For example, the other day I found a comment on one of my friends’ statuses by Shohag Gorib Manush (translation: Shohag Poor Man). The reason to that is still unknown. I have a few guesses though. We all know that nowadays, with the café culture on the rise, we ask for treat for anything and everything. Promotion? Treat. New relationship? Treat. New phone? Treat. Breakup? HELL YEAH! Treat! May be this person wants to show his friends that he is a poor man and cannot pay his expenses so that no one asks for a treat. It goes like,

  • ‘Hey Shohag, my man! Heard you’ve got a new job. So where is the treat?’
  • ‘Dude, I think my Facebook name says it all. Star Kabab?’

Okay, that was lame. Please excuse my lameness.

My cousin had this friend whose name on Facebook was ‘Tamim Pagli Tultul’ (translation: Mad for Tamim Tultul). Yeah, she is crazy about the Bangladeshi cricketer Tamim. She wants the whole world to know about that. I am not sure about the point she is trying to make though. As if Tamim will ever care. For heaven’s sake, the guy is married, give him a break. But she probably hoped that he would still put an end to his marriage and come to her. Her misconception broke when Tamim’s wife got pregnant. I know it’s hilarious, but she decided to change her name finally to her real one the day Tamim’s wife gave birth to a baby boy. I feel like I should have put an emoticon here. (Readers, at this point, think of the emoticon where you laugh so much that tears come out).

I feel like I can go on more on this stupid topic about a stupid bunch of people, but let’s not bore you to death. Have a great day and enjoy all those names that randomly send you friend requests or send you a marriage proposal that ends up in your ‘others messages’ box. And if you have anyone with that sort of name in your friendlist, do not forget to show them this piece of writing.

 

Maureen Nawer is a student of BRAC University. Her motto is ‘imperfection is perfection into a beautiful perspective.’

 

 

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